Friday, January 9, 2009

They're Back

After 52 glorious spasms-free days, I am saddened to report that the streak is broken. Yesterday morning I was cuddling with Elisabeth when I saw her eyes slightly roll back and her body slightly lunge forward. So subtle that nobody else would have even noticed it. But my heart sank. I knew.

Infantile Spasms came and went throughout the day, each time getting progressively stronger. As a mother it is painful to watch. Having witnessed first hand the devastating damage that they do to the brain, it caused slight panic to think that it might be starting up again. Like slipping back into nightmare that I was eager to forget.

In the {almost} 8 weeks that she spent spasm-free we saw many miracles as Elisabeth's brain began to heal and function. She started to vocalize, move, play, interact, and most importantly...see. These past few months have brought pure joy as we witnessed our once deteriorating child start to progress.

So yesterday, when I saw those horrid spasms making their return, I did what any mother would do...I got into combat mode. I alerted her pediatrician and neurologist. I requested that her levels be checked immediately. There is no time to waste. We have to figure this out. I just started to get my baby back....and I refuse to let her go. I refuse.
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